You can tell a father who has done a stint of serious primary parenting because he can anticipate.
There is fathering – doing half an hour of wrestling play once a day before bed and nothing much else – and then there is fathering, and you can see the difference when you see a dad who knows his shit enough to anticipate needs and problems for children before they happen. It’s a beautiful thing.
This rap song, Daddy Skills (buy it here) refers to a lot of these anticipatory problem-solving skills in parenting. It’s pretty awwwwwwww. The best bit about the song is how these guys are rapping about parenting as a ‘skill’, which is what happens when the workload of parenting is shared more across gender, the work gets credibility.