Recently I posted 10 questions on feminist motherhood and I asked mothers out there with the patience for it, because these weren’t quick and easy questions, to tackle them. The answers were fascinating, really fascinating and I got lots of mail from people who enjoyed reading the thoughts of feminist mothers; the dilemmas, the resolutions, and the choices we’d made. Some were guest posts on this site and others I linked to. If you want to browse them, look here.
So if you decide to write your own response to these questions please let me know and I can link to them, or send them via this email address here and I will put yours up as a guest post on my site.
And now… here are two more responses I’ve recently been alerted to and they’re both reeeeeeeeally interesting – one from Penguin Unearthed exploring among other things her changing perceptions of stay-at-home parenting, and another from Charlotte’s Web, who I’ve only just discovered and who looks at her fortune of choices as a feminist mother.
Here is an excerpt from Penguin Unearthed‘s post.
What has surprised you most about motherhood? How has your feminism changed over time? What is the impact of motherhood on your feminism?
Before I became a mother, I was quite intolerant (in retrospect) of stay-at-home mothers, thinking that it was a bit of a waste to “just” stay at home (I’d like to think politely, and only to myself, but I’m sure it leaked out). I was also very in favour of equal parenting, and dads playing a totally equally role in their childrens’ lives. Now our household is one in which I am the breadwinner, working outside the home, and my husband has a supplementary part-time job, but mostly looks after the children. I have much more respect for the role of the stay-at-home parent, and I am even more convinced that apart from the early breastfeeding stages, dads can be just as good at any aspect of parenting as mothers.
And from Charlotte’s Web.
Do you feel feminism has failed mothers and if so how? Personally, what do you think feminism has given mothers?
I don’t think feminism has failed mothers, but I do think women fail each other. Women judge each other for ridiculous reasons, usually because someone has made a different choice. Feminism has given women freedom of choice, and we should embrace the fact that some of us can go out and be CEOs, others can be stay-at-home mothers, others can juggle work and kids, others may not want kids, others will breast-feed while some would never consider it. Women need to accept each other’s choices and support each other more. We are so damn lucky to HAVE choices – there are millions of women in the third world who don’t have that luxury. Whether we’re feminists or not, mothers or not, we should stop failing each other, and start loving each other a little more and judging each other a little less.