Every pregnant woman complains about people touching their pregnant belly without permission. Actually, this hasn’t greatly offended me this time around. Maybe because I love the feeling of tight pregnant bellies so much myself, I kind of forgive these people for wanting one quick touch on their way past me. (All the same, don’t go touching other women’s bellies without asking first).
But what does offend me is the idea of my labour being used for comedy value. Nobody gets to make a joke about my labour but me, it is my property, and I don’t find it the slightest bit funny. So, no effing jokes. You’d be surprised how many people think it is all so ludicrous, you giving birth.
Entering a meeting room at work as the only female in the meeting.
Man: Woah, look at you, we all better sit down before you give birth. Are we going to need some stirrups in this meeting or what?
Me: Why, you due for a prostate exam?